Dear African Santa,
They tell me you keep forgetting the route to my home, the neighbours and the rest of Africa, this year I’ll be sure to send you directions on all your social media accounts and you can put me on speed dial in case this happens again. I know it would be an insult to give you cookies and milk since that is what the white Santa likes, so I’ll be sure to prepare you some steamed matooke, boiled chicken and rice with a side of beans and some greens because we want you healthy but do not forget to wash your plate, mum hates leaving dirty dishes in the sink and come with your own drinking water as ours will probably be over that day.
But African Santa, some of our homes do not have chimneys, so where will you pass, should we leave one of the windows open and if your to use the window do not switch on the light just put the presents anywhere or just throw them through the window but that is risky with thieves resuming their duties this season, just beep us when your about to reach we shall gladly open for you. I am also curious, will you be using a boda boda or an Uber because we both know you cannot manage to use reindeers or you think reindeers are some sort of slang the kids use these days. Now let me cut this short and get to the point of this letter, the presents!! You can get ideas from my posts for the presents but these are a must; A canon dslr camera, an iphone 7, chocolate and a real life Justin Bieber.
Since the day I was able to say ‘Santa’ at about 4 years old, one of my first words by the way, I was told you would come that is why I still wait for you till this day. Now I know you’ve been getting all my lists but ignore them just like the way my crush ignores my existance and DMs, this time I’ll go Tsunami on you, better deliver this year or else you might not live to see another Christmas in Africa and I know what you did last summer so handle me with utmost care and presents, Surprise me with some extras.
Yours in vain,
An African child.
#UgBlogWeek Day 2