It was a beautiful unemployed morning for me. I started the first part of my morning routine which involved turning to both sides of my bed to check if there was left over sleep I hadn’t taken care of, check, looked around the room for any other occupants (fingers crossed no serial killers), check and finally slumping back into my bed and holding my beloved and sometimes obedient lover close to my imperfect morning face,check, glad they didn’t care about my horrible morning breath. They then gave me an update of what I had missed while I was having my beauty sleep, 365 whatsapp unread messages mostly from groups and one forwarded lengthy message from person X that you never reply, a missed call from 198 and 40 percent battery life remaining, so far so good. As I was planning on which TV series that was going to occupy me for the day, there was a heavy nudge in my garage, it was time. I grabbed my beloved, a toilet roll and headed to the pit latrine (yes not toilet) to dispose off what my body had determined was waste.
So as I was texting away, replying to the good morning cliche messages and scrolling through my Instagram feed, a thought from the deeper ends of my brain arose, ‘What if, just what if, your so called beloved decides to take a leap into this uncharted place?”Stop it!!!’ I told it, ‘Let’s not think that way on such a beautiful morning’ So after about an eternity later, proud I had not left any unreplied messages and worthy posts unliked, I got up.
From this point I hardly remember what happened because up to this day I do not comprehend how my love, my best friend, my ride or die had decided to leave me and succumb to the pit of human waste. The clouds darkened, a soft wind swept through and OMD’s If you leave played briefly in the background. Boop! was the last word it said, lighting and breathing it’s last before sinking away, never to be seen or touched again. I was in utter shock, I couldn’t move or think at that moment, what was I to do? I thought. I opened the door trying to keep a straight face, the house help was outside doing some cleaning but I was too embarrassed to tell her. I walked into the house and back to the room I shared with my cousins, when one of them awoke, I shared my story and I couldn’t hold back the tears in my eyes. I just welled up and my voice was shaky explaining the tragic event that had taken place. She sympathized with me.
I was in confusion, disbelief and all those other words used to describe such an unexpected event. What was I going to do now? How was I to live without the love of my life? We had made so many plans together like to update the software so they could function better and to buy a new jacket as the old one was getting old and colourless, we were stuck with black or grey for the color and now they were gone. How could she leave without saying goodbye, without a warning? Did I not give them the best life? Charging in time, putting a pattern so they could have privacy and never leaving their side even when my mum complained we spent too much time together.
Had the world come to an end? How was it going to live without our charm and sass? How was I going to live as I was already not breathing in that moment? So many questions? We were a team, a great one at that.My lover was beautiful, well rounded and full of life that she called music and beautiful photos. She woke me up when I told her too and showed me the world in a different light. We had our moments good and bad. I now had to come to terms with the fact that she was gone and there was nothing I could do about it. I still think about you my beloved and wonder if you do the same especially since you left me with nothing but despair. Never mind I’ll find someone like and better than you hopefully and wish you the best in the after life you chose.
RIP RIP RIP.
#UgBlogWeek Day 4